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Alcohol

#Alcohol

Who discovered it and why?
I've always believed that the only honest people in this God given world are children and drunkards. This was confirmed, affirmed and reaffirmed in Kakamega one time when a drunkard opened my eyes! I always thought I knew about "her" until this sod told me what I'll never utter anywhere! That was 1999!

My college tutor (for those who know) was the cleverest guy ever, having been a lecturer at a record 22years, was a genius whose brain functioned well when inebriated. I still believe this guy, a Mangu High product was meant to go places.

It's believed that alcohol impairs one's thinking, making them tipsy, unable to make sound judgement and jittery, if not restless. However to others it makes them unusually quiet,just like Mr Nganga, my primary school teacher of Science. A guy who knew his working hours well He NEVER missed any lesson! But after work he was literally deaf and dumb. Did I read that Jesus turned water into wine in Cana?

There's another group though that becomes noisy, messy after taking one too many! This is the group that makes many people categorize drunk fellows as useless, if not desperate. In fact I must say that such people are academc spectators, zombies or imbeciles hence their grey matter cannot contain alcohol!

Now ever been at a funeral in the village and seen the spectacle from "drunkards"?For a start they are the most honest group. They tell it as it is, they do not massage facts, neither are they ashamed of what they say.

Alcohol makes the unreal looks real, albeit temporarily. The best time to get someone's true feelings is when they are inebriated. They say it as it is. They are not ashamed of themselves or how anyone will take what they say, just like a child who farts do loudly that he starts crying immediately!

Oguok Agwata to answer your question, yes it's perfectly in order to cry when drunk,they are the most honest tears. Forget about the crocodile tears when sober! This is the time to say it as it is. It's the time to promise anything and everything!

Granted, there's no one more generous than a sod. I always wonder what will happen when all pubs are closed especially in Kenya.

Ever wondered why people have coined names for liquor/soft drink brands? Sample these :

√TUSKER... Teenagers Under Sixteen Kiss Even Rats

√PILSNER...People In Love Never Entertain Rumours

√ALLSOPPS... All Land Lords  Survive On Poor People's Savings

√FANTA... Foolish Africans Never Taste Alcohol

This is in no way to mean that I support drinking. Just like Amos Tutuola, he of the Palm Wine Drinkard Fame, I'm neutral on matters water.

Butvthen I only remember these things when I am linguistically tipsy!

See!

I remain
FK
Intelligence Analyst

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